Zoe Ball

Saturday morning children’s television presenters had never been so sexy. Then spent a time presenting Channel Four pop show THE PRIORY. Now married to that DJ/producer bloke who makes up his own records by using bits of other people's records. The fruit from the loins of children’s TV presenter Johnny Ball. Yes, she was the fruit of Johnny’s balls!

Linda Barker

You can say what you like about Linda Barker. About the fact that she’s always on, and she’s got an irritating voice … etc, etc. All of which is true - but look at her arse in jeans, and you’re putting up with it! But I’ve been down to Currys just to see if she really does work there (and unfortunately she doesn’t!) So my idea about asking her for her autograph (and a shag!) went right out of the window. And she looked great in that bikini she wore in that programme once! Like Halle Berry in Die Another Day, only not black, obviously!

Fern Britton

They're as big as Jordan’s, at least (and these beauties are natural!) Bigger than Pammie’s - imagine that! Keeps them covered up a bit too much but we have had a few glimpses of them on READY STEADY COOK and now of course, on THIS MORNING (I bet Philip Scholefield has trouble keeping his eyes of those wonderful globes!) Bet he’s always got a stiffy just imagining them bared, as do I!

Fiona Bruce

Normally presents the news but has done some other shows, such as CRIMEWATCH and CALL MY BLUFF. Not immediately appealing, but worth a splash if there’s no one else on (I know I have!)

Cat Deeley

Came to everyone’s attention on ANT AND DEC’s early evening children’s television show. And we came to attention in our pants watching her! (And came too!) Has me glued to my set (well there’s something sticky sticking me to my television!) when she regularly presents CD:UK on a Saturday morning. Has presented STARS IN THEIR EYES, and is much better to spunk over than Mathew Kelly!

Katie Derham

When she does that sexy look to camera at the end of her report she’s coming on to me!! Started off on Barry Norman’s FILM programme on the BBC, moved to ITN and grew her hair long so I can run my fingers through it one day; one day when she ditches her husband she’s happily married to and shacks up with me! And I know it’s going to happen one day, I just know it!